My Name is Rach Mac and I am the director & founder of Broken Crayons Still Colour Foundation.

Before my own horrific journey through domestic violence, I was a very successful real estate agent my career had spanned over 19 years, I am also a mother to teenage twins Milla & Fletcher.

I was a social butterfly, extroverted sassy ambitious young woman with a passion for life & my chosen industry I was financially comfortable and very happy with the direction my life was taking.

Little did I know dipping my toes in the dating scene would almost cost me my life and lead me down a path I had never really heard about.

I met and fell madly in love with a man who would become my abuser , my monster my worst nightmare a man who would take my life as I knew it and turn it completely upside down in the most painful , destructive and cruelest way humanly possible.

This same man would be the man who claimed to love me like no other and I foolishly believed him.

At first I made excuses for him his jealousy and insecurity was cute must mean he was really deeply in love with me.

The verbal abuse was shocking but nothing could prepare me for the physical, Sexual and mental abuse he would bring down on me.

I found my friendships were dissolving, my career was floundering my zest for life was nonexistent replaced with my desire to not live at all.

I was well and truly in the never ending cycle of domestic violence.

Before you ask the insulting question WHY DID I JUST NOT LEAVE?

I did he found me every single time and every single time the begging would start I love you Rach, I didn’t mean to hurt you, It will never happen again.

I cannot live without you...

I was a broken woman, a terrified woman, a woman who still hopelessly loved a man who only loved to control me.

I honestly believed I could fix him and that somehow this was my fault.

But if I was to be 100 percent honest I knew it was safer to stay.

The last brutal attack I just couldn’t take it anymore, I saw the look of terror and sadness in my twin’s eyes again I couldn’t put them through it anymore I couldn’t let them see him beat me, be little me , hurt me ever again.

I knew the risk I was about to take, If I stayed I am sure he would eventually kill me and I knew dam well he would defiantly kill me if I dared leave him.

But at least if I died leaving my twins would know I tried.

I planned my escape as best as I could under the circumstances, the years that followed my escape were the most terrifying two years of my life.

I made the bold decision to have my abuser charged for every injury he ever inflicted on my body.

I made the decision to report every breach of the Violent Restraining Order (VRO).

I moved seven times he found me every single time, in that time not only was I assaulted again but optical spyware installed in my bedroom, tracking device on my car , you name it he did it and every time he was arrested and charged and every single time he made bail.

I had zero dollars left, I had to leave my career I adored so much, I had been so isolated from my friends and family...I had no one.

I created Broken Crayons Still Colour Foundation because I never ever want another person experiencing abuse to feel trapped, alone and overwhelmed, if this can happen to me it can happen to anyone.

I refused to let my journey define me nor would I drown in my journey instead I took my pain my scars and my determination to create a foundation that would save lives and inspire others.

In conclusion I never backed down once I stood tall I worked on myself to heal and find my self-worth, I learnt to love myself.

I faced my abuser in his criminal trial and he was found guilty on every single charge.

I have armed myself with knowledge and research.

 
Domestic and family violence is my passion.

 
I have a voice and I am using it I refuse to be silenced.

My name is Rach Mac and I am a broken crayon and I colour beautifully. x

The most rewarding role or title I have ever had is the one of MUM.

I created these humans and it is my honor to guide them through this thing we call life.

Motherhood suited me I am extremely maternal and embraced this role like it was created just for me.

Children are like sponges they absorb every tiny bit of information, over the years I have always been a little miffed that my children do not resemble me physically however I see it daily in their mannerism’s there is no disputing they are my children.

I have always had the attitude that my children will learn by example and I have always done my upmost to set and be an amazing example, the problem with this expectation I put upon myself I unknowingly set myself up for failure, We only want our children to see the very best in us, so what happens when they see us at our weakest?

I felt as if I had failed.

My children witnessed the majority of my domestic violence, they even testified against my abuser.

 
I felt like the most useless weakest failure as a mother, the guilt I carried knowing I had subjected my babies to that horror was overwhelming and almost broke me.

Then one day I had that light bulb moment, I didn’t chose this life for myself let alone my babies this was forced upon me, upon them.

What I didn’t give myself enough credit for was I was raising strong, independent children, children who were empathetic and resourceful.

Children who loved me despite my flaws and failures.

Their love for me didn’t change because I was a victim of domestic violence actually if anything they loved me even more fiercely.

 
My children have inspired me daily to be the person, the woman the mother I have always been.

What is my wish for my children?

To be the best version of themselves they can possibly be.

I never considered myself to be a magician but reality is I am because I created the most magical masterpieces I created my children.

I was a career orientated, ambitious real estate agent I had owned and operated three of my own real estate offices based in Queensland Australia.

I had won numerous awards and accolades throughout my 19 year career.

I had an impressive history including being one of the youngest female auctioneers and youngest female principals in the real estate industry.

I had a passion for heritage homes in the prestige market and this became my niche market and I was renowned as the agent who demands results.

I was considered to be a leader in my chosen industry.

My passion for real estate saw me accumulate an impressive property portfolio and undertake many courses in renovation and interior design.

I was honored in 2006 to be announced QLD renovator of the year for one of my own properties.

In 2008 I was humbled to win corporate citizen of the year.

A very proud moment for me personally was when I was asked to join Rotary as the youngest female to be asked, it was at this time I realized I had made my mark in the business sector predominantly in a male dominant industry.

 
Moving on from my career I enjoyed a rather active social life and was fortunate to have a wonderful circle of friends.

 
I was well traveled and thoroughly relished in throwing caution to the wind and heading overseas to different destinations exploring what life had to offer.

My life was one I created for myself, I worked hard and enjoyed the benefits that came with that.

My life was fast paced, exciting and rewarding.

When I think back now prior to my journey through domestic violence.

 
My life was pretty amazing.

Reaching out is one of the most difficult and bravest moves a victim can ever make for herself.

I made that decision and even though my road has not been an easy one it is the one I am the most proud of for not once have I wavered or been deterred in my determination to change the game and the rules.

 
Domestic & Family violence have been swept under the rug for far too long.

The white elephant in the room has been ignored this resulting in staggering numbers of not only deaths but homelessness, displaced families and mental health crisis.

 
I for one have had enough, I made a promise to all my member’s that I would not stop until I had changed our current domestic violence laws.

Our laws are far too lenient and allowing abusers to continue their reign of terror whilst we the victims live like criminals.

Our Judicial system is dramatically flawed and daily signing our death certificates.

 
Police need educating just because it’s not obvious to the naked eye does not mean there is not an internal injury.

 
Politician’s need to stop talking and focusing on their ego and actually start acting.

 
I have and will continue to call out those in authority to face their responsibilities and if unable move over so those who can will.

I refuse to be silenced...

I demand more resources and I have no hesitation in fiercely advocating against wasted funds that will not save lives.

Our system is a broken and dangerous system that requires urgent and drastic attention.

I have & will continue to use any and every forum available to me to give a voice to those who have temporarily lost theirs.

 
We Say No To Domestic Violence... Do You?

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